Get Your Happy On. Or Else.

Ever wake up and realize that your life has you by the reigns and not the opposite way around? I've realized recently that as this summer has progressed and I've taken time away from the figure world, I've taken time away from myself. There are critics who like to complain that physique competition is an inherently selfish pursuit - but I'd like to say, "what about it?"

When you're driven like you have to be driven to do a show... and you're "balls to the walls" as Kim would say, you just don't have time for other people's control shows. Since I've been out here in Utah I've been confronted with the sad reality that you look out for yourself. It'd be nice to say it ain't so, but it is. No one is going to encourage you to go to the gym everyday, to do that grueling cardio (with added altitude sickness), pump that iron, or eat the right way. In fact, if there's one thing I've learned from clean living and body consciousness is that people are threatened by someone with clearly defined goals, a sense of self, and an over all purpose.

What is this control game that everyone wants to play? When you control your own life you do not have to play by other people's rules. You can look them squarely in the eyes and say "no". You can ignore them, betray them, embrace them, whatever you choose you can say you did the right thing... because you know what's right for you. When you lose that sense of self, that sense of purpose, that drive, that need to be yourself, that's when people start taking advantage of you. Never be afraid to lose something outside yourself. You are the most precious thing you have. You have to live with yourself and your body for the rest of your life. Other people can blame you, shame you, and game you... but in the end it's up to YOU.

Surround yourself with the positive. Ignore regret. Regret is a useless emotion, it does not teach us to strive, to love, to laugh. It teaches caution and self-pity. Regret should be replaced by forgiveness. When you forgive yourself and others, you enable yourself to embrace all your faults and failings and say "this will not define me." Be friends with smiling faces. Never force connections with people you don't like, want, or need because you think you "have to." You don't. Inform your perceptions of the world around you. Anything and everything is possible. You are in control. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise.

If you are sad, mad, or troubled hold on to that feeling and remember the details. Where you are, why you feel that way, and what you can do about it. Do not blame yourself. Don't blame anyone else. Take the necessary steps to get yourself up and out of that place, but don't forget it. Everytime something great happens to you remember that moment! Look at how far you've come and let the joy envelope your soul.

Tell people how great you are! This isn't BRAGGING! This is the TRUTH. If you think you are beautiful, act it! If you think you are smart, talk about it! Don't let the YOU inside you fail to shine out. If you don't think you are something that you want to be... ignore that thought. Everyday you wake up, look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself exactly what you are: I am beautiful, I am special, I deserve the world and more. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

If all else fails: pray. That's right. Get down on those knees and let the Lord's grace pass through you. He thinks you are the best thing ever. It's about time you start thinking it too.